My grandpa passed yesterday night, at 11.47pm Last time I visited him was yesterday afternoon at 12.30pm. I guess I kinda expected this. In a way, I feel its better this way. He won’t have to suffer anymore. I got a call from my mum that he was in pretty critical condition somewhere at bout 11.40pm. Before I can leave the house to get the hospital, he already left us.. Haiz…

I want to be there beside him during his last breath, but I’m scared. I don’t think I handle deaths very well. Not the last 2 anyway… the ones I encountered during my days as a paramedic… I can’t bring myself to face with a lifeless body.. I get very emotional about it… especially so now when this person is someone I love dearly..

Anyway, mum took me to my aunt place at bout 12.30am so that I can receive the body back home. I really feel so sad just seeing his body there. He really looked very peaceful though. No more tubes inserter into him. Everyone took turns to say some prayers for him.

This morning was when all the other relatives came over. More prayers was read. Then the burial ceromony began. The body was first bathed. It was than wrapped up in cotton wool, like a mummy. Only part exposed was the face. Then he was wrapped in 1 piece of white clothe and everyone took turns to sprinkle flowers around him and give him a kiss. he felt so cold.. Haiz… finally a 2nd piece of white cloth is wrapped around him covering even his face. It was then off to the mosque where everyone present prayed for him. Lastly, we went to the cemetry where he was burried. By half past noon, everything was finished. He came from god, and to god he shall return. I pray he be taken care off. Forgive his sins. I love him lots.

Seems like my grandpa’s discharge was short lived. Last night, he collapsed while talking to my dad and was rushed to the hospital in an ambulance He suffered a major stroke which affected a large part of his brain. Following the stroke, he also got a heart attack. Went to visit him both yest and today and its really painful to see him like this.

I’m sure all those tubes inserted into him hurts a lot. I know… I’ve helped a doctor perform all these tube insertions before and it will really hurt Feel really sad just looking at him. Most of the time, his eyes are closed. Shallow and rapid breaths… How can a man I’ve always looked up upon end up like this. I’ve always had this image of him… a strong man who would not let anything get to him. A man, who used to take care of me when I was young, tolerating every thing that I did. Bringing me out for outings… Now looking at him, he can’t even recognise me. I love him so much and it hurts me just to see him in this state.

I hope he can pull through this and get better. If he can’t… I pray god takes him away fast and painlessly. Don’t let him suffer like this Even the doctor said that he might go off anytime within the next 72 hrs. Haiz..

My grandpa has just been discharged. Initially he complained of body pain and was brought to the hospital but on further checkups, the doctor said it was nothing to be worried of. That it was just muscle aches. He was treated as an outpatient and returned home. On Wed last week, we brought him back to the hospital where he was warded. Diagnosis was pneumonia Was really worried for him but today, the doctor said he is well enough to be discharged

The hospital, is not a really nice place to be. To me, it seems to be a place filled with despair and helplessness. I can never get used to a hospital evnvironment. Its a really depressing place to be in. I’m really glad he’s discharged now. I hope he gets well faster if he rest at home. I’m sure a family’s care at home will be more welcomed than even the best medical care he receives at the hospital.

Get well soon…

Muahahaha I guess I won’t be the only one to use this as a title for my blog entry I had a pretty interesting weekend this time. Met up with so many people and it was fun. Hanged out with Asfa, Zee, Arbaiya and Shidah on sat. Eating mostly. Hahahaaa

Met up with Shidah, Asfa and Arbaiya at Choa Chu Kang and Asfa drove us to bestari in Bukit Batok. Wanted to go there for seafood but unfortunately, they don’t open till 3. Bought some noodles instead. Called up Dzul to ask if he was still helping out at Bestari and he actually came down to chat. I haven’t seen him for so long now. I rem back then when we were in Taiwan doing ATEC He was the one walking with me right at the back with this really huge bandage around his head (supposedly he was injured in a mock drill and had one of us practice our bandage on him) Its nice to see him again.

Went for bowling at the Civil Service Club after that and wheee… i was on a roll.. I’m sorry gals… I can’t help it. Muahahahaha… spare and strike filled my score board. I ended the first game with a scare of 149 Awesome… Arbaiya was really cute, imitatting this old uncle beside us whos doing his warmup routine before bowling. Hilarrious.. Anyway, Arbaiya is Asfa’s sec school friend.. and YES!!! she thinks I’m cute. HAhahaaa thats a first for me Sakina joined us for the third and last game. Apparently, she’s my JC school mate but I don’t rem… Not that I bother to make friends too in JC. Sucky school.. yuck..

She went back after the game thought while the rest of us went to Causeway point in Woodlands to hang out. Picked Zee before that and yeah, apparently, she’s my JC school mate too. Hmmm…. Reached causeway pt and as you guess by now, we ended up eating again. This time in swensons. Had dinner and dessert. Yummy… There goes all my money.. ahahahhhh

Been a pretty fun sat Hmmm… I wonder why I’m the only guy in the group